Lan, another new member, gave her ‘Ice-breaker’, and an exemplary performance it was; my heart went out to this lady! She told us of growing up in a small city just outside of Shanghai, and her endeavours to get an education. She eventually became a medical Dr., always in the top four in her class, ...for those familiar with Chinese Academia, no modest feat! Five years ago she landed in ToonTown, her husband having accepted a job offer he couldn’t refuse. She took a one year course in English as a second language, and struggled to get her professional accreditation recognized. She now works as a registered nurse, and says that she is comfortable with English, except in dealing with idioms, and, of course, as it is the most difficult aspect of any language/culture to translate, humour. I don’t honestly think that five years in Shanghai under similar circumstances, would entitle me to similar boasting rights! Ya’ gotta’ admire the resilient tenacity!
Another ‘newbie’, a young lady named, I believe, Nicole, won the impromptu portion of the evening, and announced that she is joining our club. At the end of the meeting I shook her hand expressing my admiration and appreciation of her contribution to the night’s entertainment, adding, “Don’t bother filling out the paperwork ...I’m having you blackballed!”
They were really scraping the bottom of the barrel, from the perspective of ‘entertainment’, for our second speaker last night! I gave a presentation on the importance of presenting your material to several different audiences if you wished it to evolve to its full potential. At the same time I insisted that it was just as important to have it completely, and ruthlessly, evaluated at each stage in order to bring that evolution to fruition! Oddly enough, it seemed rather well received! Honestly, ...those kind members at CBA will swallow anything!
Then it was time to find a flask of inspiration at ‘Tim's’, and head on down to, ‘Refuse to Sit Down. Our Jester was in fine form, describing, in some detail, the difficulties faced by a comic when he gets a touch of food poisoning on the very day he is to perform his very first ‘Headline’ act, as well as the disruptions brought on by this digestive disorder ...both descending and ascending! Our Jester is, indeed, a real trouper!
Our first act was, appropriately enough, a first timer. He began his set by apologising for arriving late, ...that he’d taken too long in the shower! Here he pantomimed the universal gesture for the ‘sin of Onan’, stating that his dilemma was one primarily of the single male, as married men, for reasons that should be obvious, seldom have the need! Yes, it had taken forever to get the last drop out of the shampoo bottle! My admiration for a great, ‘Icebreaker’, on his first night on stage at a comedy night!
Long line of comics last night; too many to mention. Sir Lots O’ Laughs is headlining at Beily’s next Monday, and gave a solid performance. Pals Shandy and Barry both went up for a third time, and did quite well. I was happy to see one of the first timers from our unfortunate, ‘Heckle Riot’, two weeks ago in the crowd, but was disappointed that he did not grab the opportunity to take the stage. All told, a much more civilized audience last night.
Early in the evening, as I was talking to the Jester, a young lady approached him and enquired whether she might have a few minutes ‘stage time’. He told her to go for it, and, as she was giving him her name, she expressed the fear that nobody would laugh. “Don’t worry”, I assured her, “I’ll laugh.” It would be the first time I’d seen a lady on stage at Vangelli’s, and I looked forward to it. Last time I saw statistics they indicated that only about 10% of comics are of the female persuasion.
Our Jester introduced her and she began by relating that she’d been at the ‘Heckle-fest’ two weeks previous. Not only that, but, “The first act came on and spent half his set commenting on my breasts!” But, it didn’t appear that she’d been discomfited by this comedic assessment of her assets; indeed, she went on to describe how it was quite common for men, in public, to make ‘mountains of her molehills’. True to my word, I laughed!
Then, a whole whack of new material ready to trip, (perhaps stumble and fall!), off the tip of my tongue, I was up:
“Evening Vangelli’s!
Before I start, I want to assure the young lady,
I won’t stand on stage and talk about your tits!
But, I will comment on your comedic skill,
...Nice Set!”
Ain’t it great to have so many,
Bright, fresh comics,
With bright fresh material!
I call ‘em ‘Comic Studs’,
But, ...I only tell old jokes,
That makes me,
...A Comic Dud!
Don’t feel sorry for yourselves!
Feel sorry for my wife!
She’s heard ‘em so often,
She’s trying to get me put,
In an Old Jokes Home!”
I didn’t get through my material, and didn’t take my set list on stage, but shut it down at about 10 minutes. Then, it late, and I tired, I was going to head home, but the Jester announced that there were only two more comics, so I decided to stay. Next up was our, Knight of the Dark countenance, and he did a great ten minutes. Then last, but in his mind, by no means least, was this new guy, Kevin Andrusyshyn!
This fellow has only been at Vangelli’s once before, and is already claiming to be, ‘Taking Refuse to Sit Down’, by storm! Surprisingly, more than a few are agreeing with him. I don’t mean to sound petty, but I’ve been at Vangelli’s for over a year, and, really, what’s this, “Andrusyshyn”, got going for him? OK! I admit, he’s handsome ...in a sort of thuggish way, and packing all the charm of a back country backhouse! A certain stage presence ...though it’s loud and obnoxious, and a sense of humor that would knock a buzzard off a shit wagon! I’m not saying his jokes stink, but ...anyone with more taste might! Still, I must admit, ...if you can see past the overpowering character faults, he’s, well ...funny! An Older chap, though not as high a score in that department as, ‘Yours Facetiously’. Time, in comics, as in wine, tends to ‘knock off’ the rough edges, but this Andrusyshyn seems impervious to erosion! If I were to compare him to a wine I’d have to pronounce him... well, ...a ‘Sparkling Brut’.
“Et tu, Brute” might just be appropriate here, but, personnel feelings and punning aside, “Brut”, in this case, is certainly not champagne! “Brut”, in the old English tradition, is, “a partly legendary, partly historical, (As editor, might I suggest, ...'hysterical'?), chronicle.” So, it appears to me that, this, ‘Kevin Andrusyshyn’, may well be just an old story, in cheap new clothes! ‘Til I’m sure I’ll just keep eating my, ‘Spinach Broncos’.
Then, it was all over, a great night, and, a good time had by most. Before I left I managed to find the young lady comic whose ‘set’ I’d admired, shook her hand, and told her that I hoped to see her back again! I meant to do the same with the ‘Shampoo Bottle’ man, but had lost him in the crowd. Then sails for Kinley I set, shaking my head at the incredible ToonTown Tenacity!
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