...Fools Rush In!

Two and a half weeks without a comedy ‘fix’; I was Jonesing real bad, so it was great to toddle into Vangelli’s last night. I’d spent the early part of the evening at Toastmasters; a great aperitif, but now it was time for meat and potatoes! The crowd was small, with no one sitting in front of the stage, but ranged at tables throughout the bar, with quite a few right at the back.

Our Jester had made it back, finally, from his Alberta meanderings, but there weren’t many comics in attendance. I met ‘Sir Lot’s O’ Laughs’ at the door, and inside were ‘Sir Trent O’ Paisley’, and, for our main act, ‘The Black Knight’, a fellow of whom I’m particularly fond. I was feeling rusty, having not worked my material since I got back from Alberta; I’ve been too busy with other little projects.

First up was that ‘Hippy’ from the first week of the comedy contest ...the one I figured would be back! He had a loudspeaker set-up with him, a headset, and an electric guitar; he set these up, and placed the stage mike before them. To say his act was ‘bizarre’ would be doing it a kindness it didn’t merit; he played a few riffs, then called a good looking lady up on stage to hold hands with him as he sang a song. He chided a few in the crowd for talking during his ‘act’, then, called up a young fellow to sing ‘Happy Birthday’ to him, asked for a lighter from the audience that the young fellow could hold alight during the song, then blow out at the conclusion. Then, he decided to sing another song, about unzipping the Easter Bunny, before singing the birthday song! The young chap stood there politely, holding his lighter throughout! Then it was over; I suspect that the ‘hippie’ kept all his ‘Easter Eggs’ in one basket ...but ...somebody dropped the basket!

It was a relief to have Sir Paisley take the stage. He gave a strong rendition of his set, did well, and looked confident and in control throughout. Then I was on, and I did a Hodge Podge of old and new; the audience liked my admission that I’d slept with our Jester.

“Ladies, I don’t like to boast,

But, I’ve lived your favourite fantasy!

I slept with the Jester!

Just once,

And that was in Calgary,

So it doesn’t really count.

I was hoping no one would find out,

But my wife heard about it,

And asked how it was!

I said, “Honey, he’ll never replace you!

......Willingly!”

Then Sir Lot’s O’ Laughs was up for a quick set, and, finally, The Black Knight. He began by saying how he dreaded ‘open mike’ nights, because, you just never know how it will go. However, he admitted, it was great to have an opening act like we had last night, because then you just knew, that no matter how awful your own set might be, it couldn’t possibly be worse than what you were following! Our Black Knight is a pro, and it showed; his comments were mainly just observations of the evening, but, he kept the audience laughing. At one point a lady bought him a beer and brought it to the stage.

This was an interesting woman; I’d thought that she knew Sir Paisley, because she came over to our table and sat with him. When I came off stage I was headed out to the parking lot for a fresh air moment when she asked me, “What’s your sign?” I paused, traced a rectangle on my chest, and said, “Free to a good home!” The Black Knight was sitting behind her, and doubled over laughing, telling me that that was the best line of the night! I later found out that she’d started to ‘heckle’ me while I was on stage, but Sir Paisley and the Black Knight had shut her up! I told Sir Paisley not to bother in the future; heckling is something you have to face, and it seems to me that you’d be best to face right here on your home turf. If you can’t handle it there, you’ll never handle it anywhere! Besides, if her idea of heckling was to ask what my sign was, it wasn’t really heckling at all, and I would have handled it just as I did off stage, but might have asked if she had a good home!

All told a good evening, and it will happen again next week! I’ll get my Toastmasters contest out of the way this Saturday, and then will have time to put together a more polished set.